Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Review

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The movie begins with Splinter telling the Turtles how dangerous it would be for them on the surface and how they will eventually become the defenders of New York City. But the movie really begins with April O’Neil pissed off with her latest assignment and how she never achieve the status that the big name reporters have. So she starts investigating the activities of the criminal organization known as the Foot Clan and while riding back to her apartment, she happens across a Foot Clan robbery at a shipyard where she witnesses a vigilante attack that foils the attempted robbery. Once the area is clear, she investigates and finds a strange symbol painted on a shipping container and takes a photo.

Next day at Channel 6 HQ, she tells her boss that she was a witness to the attempted robbery and the vigilante attack and shows her the photo of symbol and she is instantly ignored. But April is unwilling to give up the story so while in the van with  Vernon Fenwick, they see people running from a subway station and April runs in to see what’s going on and is soon captured and taken hostage by the Foot Clan. The mysterious vigilantes quickly come to the rescue and disappear up a dust shoot so she runs up the fire escape of a nearby fire escape where she sees them celebrate their victory and takes a photo. However, the flash gives her away and she confronted by them. She sees they’re not human and eventually faints. She wakes up and finds them standing over her asking if she was okay. The turtles argue amongst themselves and give April back her stating that the picture has been deleted from the memory and threaten her that if she says anything about their existence, they will find her (very Liam Neeson!) but that doesn’t stop her taking another photo as they leave.

As she heard that one is called “Raphael”, she goes back to her apartment and finds a box with a scientific journal in it detailing Project Renaissance where she named she four turtles after renaissance artists…

You know what, I can’t even finish this review as I wasn’t even paying attention and spent the majority using my phone or mentally playing Angry Birds. Although I did smile at some of wisecracks that Mikey delivered, I found this movie to be stupid and boring. It also relied too heavily on gratuitous slo-mo and things exploding and some things in it just didn’t make sense like Splinter becoming a ninja master after reading a book on ninjitsu he found in the sewer and the line “We’ll drain every last drop of blood from them, even if it kills them”, if you drain blood from any living thing, OF COURSE IT WILL KILL THEM! Dumbass!

I have no favourite scene so here’s an honest trailer

and my favourite scene from Taken

My score: 3 / 10

Final thought: DAMN YOU, MICHAEL BAY!!!

Kathy Rain: A Detective Is Born Review

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Set in the 90’s and has that artistic style of a genuine 90’s era point ‘n’ click adventure game, players take on the role of Kathy Rain. Kathy, while attending college studying journalism, learns of her grandfather’s death and returns to Conwell Springs to attend the funeral. Afterwards, she decides that the mysterious circumstances leading up to his death warrant a closer look so she decides to start investigating.

She soon gets her dormmate and best friend, Eileen Summers, involved when she discovers a link to a girl named Lily Myers who committed suicide, a local church called ‘The Order of The Holy Trinity’ and a mysterious entity that is known as ‘The Crimson One’

Along the way, Kathy must face her own personal demons and learn to overcome them.

My thoughts

Being a fan of point ‘n’ click adventure games, I was looking for one that would really satisfy me; I really those like that feature police detectives or private detectives or FBI agents on the hunt for serial killers but after looking at artistic style and playing the demo, I was hooked and had to get the full version.

The story-telling was excellent and the puzzles weren’t too hard, although I had to use a walkthrough to clear some of them. But I have to say it had the feel of a Silent Hill game toward the end. Overall a very good game and worth the money!

My Score: 9 / 10

The X Files Season 10 Review- Episode 1 ‘My Struggle’

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After 14 years, Mulder and Scully are back to investigate the unexplained and untangle the web of governmental corruption and deceit.

The episode opens with Mulder recounting his life with the FBI, how he investigated paranormal science cases through the X Files unit, the assignment of Scully by his superiors to debunk it and his unwavering belief that his sister, Samantha, was abducted by aliens when he was 12 years old. The FBI shutdown the X Files in 2002 ending their investigations but Mulder had always believed that the truth was still out there.

Now we rewind back to Roswell, New Mexico in 1947 where we see a UFO make a crash landing and a medical doctor is being driven to the site by bus accompanied by a man in black. Back to the present day and just as Scully is about to go into surgery, she is told by a nurse that she has an urgent phone call from A.D. Walter Skinner. She takes the call and then calls Mulder afterwards telling him that Tad O’Malley, the host of a web show called “Truth Squad”, wants to meet with them.

The pair reunite and meet O’Malley where he escorts them into his car because of his fear of low flying aircraft using “dirtboxes” to record conversations.. As they are driven through the streets, O’Malley reveals his plan to unveil the truth on the biggest conspiracy ever known but he needs their expertise in order to go “all in”. Mulder is intrigued, yet skeptical, as he believes that he could be just using them to further his career so he brings them to see a woman named Sveta.

Sveta tells them she has been abducted many times and shows the marks left behind when her babies were removed from her womb, she also tells them that she has alien DNA where Scully asks if that been verified by a doctor. Sveta answers no and Mulder wrangles Scully into performing that test. Later in the hospital as Scully is performing the test on Sveta, she reveals that Mulder and Scully were a couple, that they have a child together  and Mulder has been suffering from depression that ended their relationship. Scully demands that she stop.

Meanwhile, Mulder is taken by O’Malley to a secret location and shown an ARV (Alien Replica Vehicle) and is in awe over its capabilities. Afterwards, O’Malley walks in on Scully taking a sample of her own blood and sees the kind of work she is involved with in the hospital, she assists the surgeons to operate on children born without ears. O’Malley talks about how “alien” it looks where Scully says that is purely coincidental and they talk about her work on the X Files and her relationship with Mulder. O’Malley then says he wanted to check if she wasn’t upset by what Mulder made her do and that he just wanted to see her.

Mulder visits Sveta and asks why she was hesitant to speak about her abductions and she eventually reveals that it wasn’t aliens behind the abductions but men. While riding in O’Malley’s car, Scully receives a call from Mulder and he tells her that everything in the X Files is a lie.

Mulder then goes to the FBI and Skinner leads him into his old basement office and finds that the filing cabinets are gone and they have a rather heated confrontation about it. Before she heads back into surgery, a nurse give Scully her test results and once she reads them, she asks the nurse to have them re-tested. Mulder then meets with the doctor who was on-site at the UFO crash in Roswell and tells him of the things he has learned.

Later, Mulder and Scully have a heated argument on Mulder’s front porch where she sees Sveta and she leaves but O’Malley arrives and asks her to stay. In Mulder’s living room they reveal the conspiracy, that the government’s main objective to take over the US and then the world and that aliens were actually concerned about mankind and the government have been hoarding the alien technology. Scully is disgusted by this and says that Sveta has no alien DNA.

The next day, Scully watches “Truth Squad” where she sees Sveta deny everything O’Malley has said and he isa liar who made her make up stories about alien abductions. A nurse then gives the results of her re-tests. Mulder, also watching the show, goes to Sveta’s house and finds it empty. The ARV is soon destroyed by a commando team. Scully then looks up the show only to get a message saying that the site has been temporarily been removed. She meets Mulder in hospital car park and reveals to him that Sveta does have alien DNA but she has it too and she is willing to re-join him to stop the conspirators. Sveta is then killed in an explosion as she is driving.

The episode then ends on Cancerman saying, “We have a small problem… they’ve re-opened the X Files.”

My thoughts

I was very excited to hear that The X Files were coming back to TV and that the original stars were back. Gillian and David still have the spark and perfectly compliment each but in all honesty, I didn’t think this episode was the spectacular return to form I hoped and found the plot a little confusing I mean, I had to watch it two or three times in order to get a full understanding of it. I guess that’s just an ageing brain for you.

Nevertheless, I was entertained by this.

Here’s my favourite scene from the episode.

 

My score 6 / 10

Watch out for my review of Episode 2 – Founder’s Mutation, coming soon!